To Remember...

Daily - Synthroid, Glucophage, Metanx, Prenatal, B. Asa., Vit. E
FET # 2, SET of an embie graded 2.0, frozen on day 7 & hatched
3.21.10 - CD 1
3.23.10 - Begin BCPs
4.8.10 - Start Lupron
4.15.10 - Last BCP
4.18.10 - CD 1
4.22.10 - Start Estrace
5.6.10 - CD 15 u/s (9.7mm lining)
5.6.10 - Last Lupron
5.6.10 - Start Medrol
5.6.10 - Start PIO
5.10.10 - Last Medrol
5.11.10 - ET (8:30am)
5.20.10 - Beta (208)
5.20.10 - Start Heparin
5.22.10 - Beta #2 (622) & P4 33.9
5.26.10 - Beta # 3 (5097) & TSH 2.42
6.2.10 - U/S #1 (4:15pm) (DX w/ Blighted Ovum)
6.8.10 - U/S #2 (9:30am) (DX Confirmed told to stop meds.)
6.24.10 - U/S # 3 (9:30am) (Final Confirmation)
6.24.10 - D&C (Report to hospital @ 11:30am/Surgery @ 1:00pm)

Trying to Move On...

Sweet Angel Baby

6.24.10 - 9 weeks

Good Week/Bad Week

I can’t believe it’s time for ICLW already! During last month’s ICLW, my DH and I had just found out that we were pregnant and that we had more than doubling betas. One month later, we are preparing for a D&C. It’s crazy how much things can change in the matter of a day or so, for the good or for the bad.

Wednesday is our 3rd anniversary. We haven’t been able to go on a vacation the last couple of summerw do to the timing of our infertility treatments. And, again this summer, we are not sure where we will be able to go. So, I planned an overnight get-a-way for us. I haven’t even told my DH where we are going! I am even going to pack for him tonight. We are dropping our puppies off at the in-laws around 7:45am tomorrow and will pick them up around 11:00pm on Wednesday night. I am looking forward to the next couple of days even though it’s only something small.

Thursday on the other hand is another story. We have another confirmation u/s scheduled for 9:00am and I have to be at the hospital at 11:30am. The surgery itself is scheduled for 1:00pm. Of course, I am not looking forward to this. But, then again, I am ready for this to be over. I am so miserable.

I am very hopeful that next month I will have so more positive news for ICLW. This depressing stuff is horrible.

I'm Here

My motto the last few days has been to focus on the good and not the bad. Of course, that’s easier said than done. No one should have to go through a miscarriage let alone more than one. This is one of the toughest things that has happened to me in my life and it’s happened three times.

DH has been wonderful these past few weeks. He has been waiting on me hand and foot, getting me out of the house and dealing with my emotional breakdowns.

I have so much to say…
• The morning sickness has gotten worse. It’s been over a week since I stopped my medications. I called my RE’s office Tuesday like I was instructed to do so. After several phone calls, it has been decided that we may need to complete a D&C. Right now, the surgery is scheduled for next Thursday at 1:00pm EST. If something happens before then, I am to call my nurse. I have already registered at the hospital and a nurse will be calling me tomorrow to tell me all of the details.
• I have golfed twice in the last week. I haven’t got to golf much in the past few years due to fertility treatments, so getting out on the course has been great. I even got a new driver!
• Our three year anniversary is next week (Wednesday). Last year, we didn’t get to go way due to our IVF cycle. So, I have planned a short get-a-way for us next Tuesday and Wednesday. (My RE’s surgery day is Tuesday. So, I guess I got some strings pulled to get my surgery on Thursday). DH has no clue where we are going!
• I bought a new program called S.crapbook F.actory. I totally revamped our profile. Want good news? We printed them off Tuesday and turned them into the agency today!
• We also emailed our letter and photos to the agency that will be on their website. It’s such a relief to have all of that complete
• Our graduate class is going….. well, it’s going. I can’t wait until it’s over. As of the coming Sunday, it’s half way over.
• DH and I have been sanding our back deck. We bought our house new a couple years ago, but our deck had never been stained. For many reasons, we never got around to it. So, that’s what we are trying to get done around the house.
• I have all of the paperwork filled out to fax to the immunologist that we have been referred to, but we can’t send it until this pregnancy is resolved. The receptionist that I talked to at the office said it normally takes two weeks to get an appointment.

Confirmation

The ultrasound today confirmed a blighted ovum. At both appointments, we had a gestational sac measuring several days ahead of what it should. Last Thursday, the day after the first ultrasound, I started throwing up and I haven’t stopped since. This is miserable. I would happily be sick all day everyday if it would be leading to a healthy pregnancy, but this is not. So, I am ready for it to be gone.

I am to stop my medication immediately. This morning was my last dose of PIO. Of course I will continue my S.yntroid and my RE wants me to continue my M.etanx.

This is our third miscarriage. Our first was in March 09, we were able to miscarrying at home after only 3 days being off of medications. My betas were very low. Our second miscarriage was last August after our fresh IVF cycle. This pregnancy was twins, one baby that lost its heartbeat and another blighted ovum. We had a D&C.

I am beginning to wonder if my eggs could be part of the problem. I have never had CD3 (FSH) blookwork. I think that I would like to.

My RE has referred me to Dr. K.wak-Kim in Illinois. She specializes in immunology and RPL. We are hopeful that our insurance will cover all or at least some of the testing that she is going to do. I heard that she is one of the best. Heck, now we get to plan a mini-vacation to Chicago this summer!

We have no intentions to cycle anytime soon. Summers are the only option and money of course is a concern. So, the earliest that we may cycle would be next summer. Right now, we are going to focus on our adoption and see where that leads us. We want to go through the testing to see what we may be dealing with in the future… more on that in the future.

So, for now…we are doing all the things that we haven’t been able to do lately.

Waiting to miscarry is torture.

Not Good

Blighted ovum. Our hopes have been totally destroyed. Why us?

Summer is here!

I have been so overwhelmed with your comments on my posts; each and every word means so much to me. I would like to say a big THANK YOU to whoever submitted our story to LFCA. That was awesome!

This is our third pregnancy. Our numbers have never done what we wanted them to do. I still can’t get over the fact of how great our betas have been thus far. I took a C.learblue D.igital HPT Monday just to remind myself that this is actually happening. I have off and on symptoms. I guess you can call them symptoms; but who knows it maybe from the PIO injections. I remember that during our last pregnancy I started getting pretty bad m/s around 7weeks. So, we shall see.

What were your symptoms around 6 weeks?

Today, summer officially started for me and DH’s summer starts Thursday afternoon. Tomorrow is a big day for us! Our u/s is scheduled for 4:15pm est; we will be 5w6d. I think we are going to go ahead of time to grab a bite to eat. I will try my best to post ASAP, but hopefully we will be out celebrating!